teething and other thoughts

teething.  yikes.  not our best afternoon.  Sometimes when you're baby is crying/fussing it's all very frustrating and an exercise in stress and anger management . . . and then sometimes it's just SAD.  And there's no way you could even be upset at her because how can you be upset at that scrunched up, bright red, drool-snot-and-tear covered face with a pouty lip (why is blogger telling me that pouty isn't a word?) and a cry that is just so darn sad??  So you get her to take double naps, you nurse her twice as much, use the orajel, try and fail with with the cold frozen-cornered washcloth, try the park swings and get pity and advice from a stranger with a two-yr-old, and then wander BYU's scenic paths for a couple of hours which worked the best of all of the above. 

(side story--last time Tanner and I were walking there I said to him "there are certain places on campus or in Provo that whenever I'm there, it'll remind me of a certain person or memory or time in my life, and this path always reminds me of you because of that time before your mission when we would play air hockey together on Fridays and then go and get Jamba juice and we went walking on this path once in the winter talking and drinking our Jamba juices."  Sweet right?  He laughed and said "oh really?  I don't remember that.  This path always reminds me of my old girlfriend because this is where we had our first kiss.")

anyways.   Teething baby not fun. 

I was thinking today about bloggers and positivity/negativity.   I read somewhere once, "no one likes a bad mood blogger", which I completely agree with, who wants to read someone who's complaining all the time? (or be friends with them in real life for that matter) but at the same time I think a lot of these people are going for genuine.  authentic.  real, open, honest, relate-able.   And now that I'm thinking about it, this isn't just a blogging question, it's a life question--how do you know when sharing the bad is being open and real with people, and when you're sharing too much bad and just spreading gloom, doom, and negative vibes?

Like, I remember being pregnant and talking to some moms who feel the need to tell it to you "like it is" and go on and on about sleepless nights, how your body will never be the same, and how it will blow your mind how expensive everything gets.  All topics with definite potential to majorly freak out a mother-to-be.  But then again there are those who leave all those details out and prefer to just gush about how every moment is bliss, joy, and tiny-toed, angel-faced perfection.  (and there are more than a couple of bloggers out there who are making me start to think that all they ever do is walk around the city in extremely fashionable clothing, with their extremely fashionable friends eating (and photographing) perfect looking food at chic urban locations.  that and go on vacations.  with their kids who never drool, cry, poop, spit-up, teeth, or get any of the above mentioned bodily fluids all over their extremely fashionable clothing) And if those picture perfect times are the only ones you share with your mother-to-be friend, she'll probably be in danger of thinking something is seriously wrong with her when she starts raising her baby and that isn't exactly how things pan out every day. 

I remember the same thing when I was engaged.  People from some sides making absolute sure that I knew things weren't going to be all roses and sunshine--that things are hard, husbands annoy, divorces happen, bills pile up, life won't ever be the same and you won't have fun ever again doom and gloomers.  And then those who want to make you think they never ever fight and go around posting anniversary love notes to their husband all over their web-spaces (sorry, but those bug me.  What happened to writing all those sweet, personal expressions of love in a nice card or saving them for your candlelit dinner?  Why does all of Facebook need to hear it?) expressing the sentiment that every single second has been more than they ever dreamed.

The happy medium is hard to figure out.  I will always believe in positivity.  On looking at the bright side, recognizing, remembering and cherishing the perfect moments, shrugging off the bad days, looking for the silver lining.  You know, optimism.  But I would never want to do that with the aim of inspiring jealousy in others.  Or come off as fake.  Or fool anyone into thinking that my life is a series of perfectly happy days that never get me down.

That's all.